LOL
well ole' snipe won't be winning any Politicly Correct awards anytime soon
Overkill??? I'd kill a fly with a howitzer if I had one.
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| Two holiday classics http://warthogterritory.net/forum/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=4021 |
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| Author: | M21 Sniper [ 03 Dec 2003, 14:41 ] |
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TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE RAMADAN: Published: Posthumously Author: Mullah Mohammed Omar Twas the night before Ramadan, and all through the cave Not a creature was stirring, it felt like a grave. The turbans were hung by the firepit with care, In hopes that the US Air Force would not soon be there. The soldiers were restless, without any beds, While visions of air strikes flashed in their heads. Osama in his burkha, and I in my goatskin cap, Had just settled down for a cold, barren winter's nap, When out on the ledge, there arose such a clatter, I grabbed my Kalashnikov to see what was the matter. Away from the racket, I ran like a girl, Tripped over a goat, into a ball I did curl. The moon shone down, on the new-fallen snow And lit up the valley, with an ominous glow. When, what to my one good eye should appear, But a dozen Apaches, and M-1's in the rear. And their leader so fearless, his troops he did push, I knew in an instant- it must be George Bush. More rapid than eagles, his forces they came, And they whistled and shouted, and called out our names- "Now Omar! Osama! Muhammad! Abdul! We come for you now, we've taken Kabul! To the top of the cliffs, to the back of their caves! When you chose this war, you dug your own graves!" As the dry leaves, that before the assault choppers fly, When they meet with an obstacle, light up the sky. So up to the ledge, his forces they flew- with full magazines, and flamethrowers too. And then in a twinkling, I heard with a thud the explosions of Tomahawks, not one was a dud. As I chambered my rifle, and was turning around, Osama was there, disguised in a gown. He was dressed all in drag, from his head to his toes, And he said he would flee, while I held off his foes. A bundle of money he had stuffed in his pack, He said "I'm going to Baghdad, and I'm not looking back!" His eyes were all glassy, he trembled with fear; The American bombs, they rang in his ears. He saddled his goat, then turned tail and fled, But a US sniper, shot him in the head. I watched with cold fear, as his body did slump- The goat threw him off, he fell with a thump. And so there I stood, my plans all destroyed, about to suffer a fate I could not avoid. I dropped to my knees, asked Allah for help, His voice boomed in my ears, "YOU IGNORANT WHELP! I gave you the Bible, the Torah and Koran, But you were too arrogant to understand! I told you to honor, your neighbors and wives- not to enslave them, or degrade their lives! You invoke My name, to sanction your deeds, but you are the last thing, that this world needs- And so I'll send you and bin Laden to Hell." The last words I heard, as the bombs fell, Were from George Bush himself, as he scaled the wall, "ONE NATION, UNDER GOD, WITH LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL!" ------------------------------------------ 'TWAS THE NIGHT OVER BAGHDAD (Courtesy of SAC) 'Twas the night of the trials when all through Iraq, All the troops were assembled, each one with a pack. The Kuwaitis were fleeing their country with care 'Cause large profits from oil were not theirs to share. The locals were huddled on palace-like floors As Iraqi soldiers were storming the doors. With all the world watching and soldiers on guard, Even reporters said that Saddam was too hard. When right over Baghdad there arose such a clatter Hussein jumped up to see what was the matter. Away to the window he flew like a flash Pulled back his mustache and threw up the sash. Then what to his beady little eyes should appear, But B-52's with Christian bombardiers. With a squadron of Eagles guarding their flanks, He knew in a moment it must be the Yanks. With chuckle that was heard as far as the Nile, "IP inbound" the Nav announced with a smile. The crew-dogs all thought it was a nice touch of class, To change most of Iraq from sand into glass. Now rockets, now mortars, now B-52's, Let's light up old Baghdad for the late evening news. Over guard came these words just before the attack, "If you missed sunrise today, here's another from SAC". On the mosque, on the palace, on every last wall, Bombs Away, Bombs Away, Let the nukes fall! Then onto the rooftops the bombs they did fall With great mushroom clouds engulfing them all. It was SAC's little present To Saddam the great sage- A fully paid ticket Back to the Stone Age And then the planes turned, heading back to their homes, Assured that Saddam was charred to the bone. The flight leader exclaimed as they stared to land, "That's one for the good guys, the ragheads be damned!" <img src="http://www.worldaffairsboard.com/sigs/snipersig.jpg " border=0> |
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| Author: | Stinger [ 03 Dec 2003, 15:13 ] |
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LOL well ole' snipe won't be winning any Politicly Correct awards anytime soon
Overkill??? I'd kill a fly with a howitzer if I had one. |
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| Author: | boomer [ 03 Dec 2003, 15:29 ] |
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ROFL god I love the SAC one "We sleep safely in our beds because rough men stand ready in the night to visit violence on those who would harm us". George Orwell Fighting For Justice With Brains Of Steel ! <img src="http://www.fas.org/man/dod-101/sys/ac/atengun2X.GIF" border=0> |
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| Author: | M21 Sniper [ 03 Dec 2003, 16:17 ] |
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Ole' Snipe does not care for such niceties as awards.
<img src="http://www.worldaffairsboard.com/sigs/snipersig.jpg " border=0> |
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| Author: | Williamz [ 04 Dec 2003, 04:44 ] |
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Damn tat was funny, but i cant help feeling like some iraqi mite be seein this. Everybody has to be some where in life. Acedemidian Porovst Zharkov "For I have Tasted the fruit" |
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| Author: | Williamz [ 04 Dec 2003, 05:12 ] |
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who cares?<img src=icon_smile_question.gif border=0 align=middle> its like reallly funny anyways..... so wat next humiliating turks, talking about iraqis again? If you see a bomb technician running try to keep up |
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| Author: | 30mike-mike [ 04 Dec 2003, 07:28 ] |
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Twas the Night Over Bahgdad is from DSI. Best add Dice' "Warthog The Ugly Airplane " to the list, Snipe!<img src=icon_smile_cool.gif border=0 align=middle> Hajji, you can run, but why die tired? |
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| Author: | M21 Sniper [ 04 Dec 2003, 11:17 ] |
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Yeah, that's a friggin instant classic. 
LOVED it Rob.
<img src="http://www.worldaffairsboard.com/sigs/snipersig.jpg " border=0> |
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| Author: | M21 Sniper [ 04 Dec 2003, 13:25 ] |
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Horatio the flame nosed attack Jet Sung to the tune of Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer You know Spirit and Spectre and Lancer and Falcon Cobra and Corsair and Tomcat and Talon, But do you recall The most famous airplane of all? Warthog, the ugly airplane, Had a very gunny nose, And if you ever fired it, You would even say it glows. All of the other airplanes, Used to laugh and call him names. They never let poor Warthog, Join in any Air Force games. Then one sandy Desert Storm, George Bush came to say, “Warthog, with your gun so right, Won’t you kill some tanks tonight?” Then how the Air Force loved him, as they shouted out, "You're great!!" Warthog the ugly airplane you'll be here till '28! <img src="http://www.worldaffairsboard.com/sigs/snipersig.jpg " border=0> |
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| Author: | 44hollowpoint [ 04 Dec 2003, 13:55 ] |
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I just can't stop laughing... That is something else, 10 out of 10... "A .44 magnum beats 4 Aces everytime..." |
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| Author: | Dice [ 04 Dec 2003, 15:00 ] |
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<BLOCKQUOTE id=quote><font size=1 face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" id=quote>quote:<hr height=1 noshade id=quote> I just can't stop laughing... That is something else, 10 out of 10... "A .44 magnum beats 4 Aces everytime..." <hr height=1 noshade id=quote></BLOCKQUOTE id=quote></font id=quote><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" size=2 id=quote> I can't take credit, that goes to a young lady at Lackheed Martin Owego NY. who works the A-10 PE program. BTW you can get a printable copy here... http://www.warthogpen.com/humor1_files/rednosel.jpg Edited by - Dice on Dec 04 2003 2:16 PM |
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| Author: | tritonal [ 04 Dec 2003, 23:06 ] |
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My favorite verse: <i>Then how the Air Force loved him, as they shouted out, "You're great!!" Warthog the ugly airplane you'll be here till '28!</i> |
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| Author: | 30mike-mike [ 05 Dec 2003, 06:45 ] |
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Ah, but you get credit for bringing it to the world's attention, Dice! I can just hear Gene Autry singing it with great gusto!<img src=icon_smile_big.gif border=0 align=middle> Hajji, you can run, but why die tired? |
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| Author: | M21 Sniper [ 23 Dec 2006, 22:24 ] |
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An Xmas "Bump" is in order here methinx.
Merry Xmas eve once again to all the Hoglets in all the lands! <img src=newicons/smiley_salute.gif border=0 align=middle> "US Army Snipers...providing surgical strikes since 1776." |
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