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Mensa Invitational
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Author:  44hollowpoint [ 06 Mar 2006, 03:56 ]
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The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners:

1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of
getting laid.

5. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

13. Glibido: All talk and no action.

14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.

And the pick of the literature:

18. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an a*seh0le.

You're born, you keep your head down and you die. If you're lucky...

Author:  30mike-mike [ 06 Mar 2006, 07:43 ]
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<img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle>

The Second Amendment: America's original homeland security.
Ya just can’t take life too seriously, because you aren’t going to get out of it alive anyway.

Author:  boomer [ 06 Mar 2006, 09:08 ]
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<BLOCKQUOTE id=quote><font size=1 face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" id=quote>quote:<hr height=1 noshade id=quote> 14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.<hr height=1 noshade id=quote></BLOCKQUOTE id=quote></font id=quote><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" size=2 id=quote>
<img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle>
<img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle>
<img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle>

A 45 has a muzzle.
A 9mm has a bullet vent.

Author:  Ice Pirate [ 06 Mar 2006, 12:34 ]
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<img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/anim_bannana.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle>Way too funny!

"Slow is Fast - Fast is Slow"

Author:  MrMudd [ 06 Mar 2006, 14:52 ]
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Fake.

It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it.
The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.Somebody left the cork out of my lunch.

Author:  44hollowpoint [ 06 Mar 2006, 15:06 ]
Post subject: 

No, a fake is something or somebody who sets out to deceive.

This was a piss take.

But I'll label things more clearly in the future for those who struggle to tell the difference...

You're born, you keep your head down and you die. If you're lucky...

Author:  MrMudd [ 06 Mar 2006, 15:17 ]
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<BLOCKQUOTE id=quote><font size=1 face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" id=quote>quote:<hr height=1 noshade id=quote>
No, a fake is something or somebody who sets out to deceive.

This was a piss take.

But I'll label things more clearly in the future for those who struggle to tell the difference...

You're born, you keep your head down and you die. If you're lucky...
<hr height=1 noshade id=quote></BLOCKQUOTE id=quote></font id=quote><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" size=2 id=quote>

Are you a Mensa Member or one that believes every junk email that hits your Inbox?

I have Been a Mensa Member since 1983.

It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it.
The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.Somebody left the cork out of my lunch.

Author:  44hollowpoint [ 06 Mar 2006, 15:24 ]
Post subject: 

You've missed the point and allowed the bug up your ass to get in the way of a bit of humour.

I got an email that was clearly a joke, but still funny and thought others might also see the funny side.

I'm not a member of Mensa nor would I ever be able to pass the grade should I try, but I wouldn't want to.

Again just to point it out to any other Mensa members who might be struggling.

IT WAS A JOKE..!

You're born, you keep your head down and you die. If you're lucky...

Author:  MrMudd [ 06 Mar 2006, 16:00 ]
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Thats my Mission here.

It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it.
The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.Somebody left the cork out of my lunch.

Author:  fenderstrat72 [ 06 Mar 2006, 19:26 ]
Post subject: 

<BLOCKQUOTE id=quote><font size=1 face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" id=quote>quote:<hr height=1 noshade id=quote>You've missed the point and allowed the bug up your ass to get in the way of a bit of humour. <hr height=1 noshade id=quote></BLOCKQUOTE id=quote></font id=quote><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" size=2 id=quote> .44HP

<BLOCKQUOTE id=quote><font size=1 face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" id=quote>quote:<hr height=1 noshade id=quote>Thats my Mission here. <hr height=1 noshade id=quote></BLOCKQUOTE id=quote></font id=quote><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" size=2 id=quote> Muddy

I love these little spats that tend to break out periodically here on "As the WT turns." LOL

Fender

"Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it."
George Bernard Shaw

Author:  MrMudd [ 06 Mar 2006, 19:34 ]
Post subject: 

This site wouldnt have a pulse, if I didnt poke someone out of their comfort zone.

It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it.
The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.Somebody left the cork out of my lunch.

Author:  44hollowpoint [ 07 Mar 2006, 05:19 ]
Post subject: 

<BLOCKQUOTE id=quote><font size=1 face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" id=quote>quote:<hr height=1 noshade id=quote> if I didnt poke someone out of their comfort zone<hr height=1 noshade id=quote></BLOCKQUOTE id=quote></font id=quote><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" size=2 id=quote>

That statement implies presence of forethought rather than as I suspect, some unique form of FTS (Forum Tourettes Syndrome)…

You're born, you keep your head down and you die. If you're lucky...

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