Warthog Territory Forums
https://warthogterritory.net/forum/

Funny UK news snippets
https://warthogterritory.net/forum/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=7000		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  M21 Sniper [ 02 Sep 2004, 07:52 ]
Post subject: 
FROM THE BRITISH NEWSPAPERS



Commenting on a complaint from a Mr Arthur Purdey about a large gas
bill, a
spokesman for North Westgas said, "We agree it was rather high for
the time
of year. It's possible Mr Purdey has been charged for the gas used up
during
the explosion that destroyed his house." (The Daily Telegraph)

A young girl who was blown out to sea on a set of inflatable teeth was
rescued by a man on an inflatable lobster. A coastguard spokesman
commented,
"This sort of thing is all too common". (The Times)

Police reveal that a woman arrested for shoplifting had a whole
salami in
her knickers. When asked why, she said it was because she was missing
her
Italian boyfriend. (The Manchester Evening News)

Irish police are being handicapped in a search for a stolen van,
because
they cannot issue a description. It's a Special Branch vehicle and
they
don't want the public to know what it looks like. (The Guardian)

At the height of the gale, the harbourmaster radioed a coastguard on
the
spot and asked him to estimate the wind speed. He replied he was
sorry, but
he didn't have a gauge. However, if it was any help, the wind had
just blown
his Land Rover off the cliff. (Aberdeen Evening Express)

Mrs. Irene Graham of Thorpe Avenue, Boscombe, delighted the audience
with
her reminiscence of the German prisoner of war who was sent each week
to do
her garden. He was repatriated at the end of 1945, she recalled "He'd
always
seemed a nice friendly chap, but when the crocuses came up in the
middle of
our lawn in February 1946, they spelt out "Heil Hitler." (Bournemouth
Evening Echo)

"Molon labe".
Leonidas, King of Sparta,
Thermopylae, 480 B.C.
Author:  30mike-mike [ 02 Sep 2004, 08:57 ]
Post subject: 
Those crazy brits! <img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle>

"Live every day like it's the last, 'cause one day you're gonna be right!" Ray Charles (6/10/04 was the day)
Page 1 of 1 All times are UTC [ DST ]
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
http://www.phpbb.com/