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| Airplanes vs. Women... https://warthogterritory.net/forum/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=7068 |
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| Author: | Horrido [ 07 Sep 2004, 14:42 ] |
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Not sure if this has been posted, previously, but... AIRPLANES VS WOMEN 1. Airplanes can kill you quickly; a woman takes her time. 2. Airplanes can be turned on by a flick of a switch. 3. Airplanes don't get mad if you 'touch and go.' 4. Airplanes don't object to a preflight inspection. 5. Airplanes operate inverted. 6. Airplanes come with manuals to explain their operation. 7. Airplanes have strict weight and balance limits. 8. Airplanes can be flown any time of the month. 9. Airplanes don't come with in-laws. 10. Airplanes don't care about how many other airplanes you have flown before. 11. Airplanes and pilots both arrive at the same time. 12. Airplanes don't complain if you hose them down. 13. Airplanes don't mind if you like to look at other airplanes. 14. Airplanes can get high without throwing up. 15. Airplanes expect to be tied down. 16. Airplanes don't comment on your piloting skills. 17. Airplanes don't whine unless something is really wrong. 18. However, when airplanes go quiet, just like a woman, it's a bad thing. A suicidal determination to live... |
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| Author: | tritonal [ 07 Sep 2004, 15:56 ] |
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<img src=icon_smile_clown.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> |
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| Author: | Smitty216 [ 07 Sep 2004, 18:41 ] |
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Airplanes also stop whining at the flick of a switch. ".....leave the bodies. The buzzards gotta eat too." Smitty |
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| Author: | kingfrogger [ 08 Sep 2004, 11:07 ] |
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Let's see if my dirty mind can add a few more to this list... Airplanes don't mind if there's more than one pilot in their cockpit. Airplanes realize there's a limited fuel supply. You can get out of one airplane and immediately get into another without complications or jealousy. “Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote.” Benjamin Franklin, 1759 |
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| Author: | poke [ 09 Sep 2004, 23:25 ] |
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1. I can kill you quickly if you'd like. 2. Airplanes can be turned on by a flick of a switch, but unless you take the time to start the engines or get an outside power source, it only lasts for a few minutes. 3. Airplanes don't get mad if you 'touch and go.' You just have to have a really good approach. 4. Airplanes don't object to a preflight inspection, but then, they don't have to rely on the pilots to be ready to fly. 5. Some pilots can't tell when they are flying a fighter, and when they are flying a cargo. 6. Airplanes come with manuals to explain their operation. But of course, it's only useful if the pilot READS the manual. 7. Airplanes have strict weight and balance limits, and a load master or two to keep them there. 8. Airplanes can be flown any time of the month, except for the multiple monthly, annual and perennial maintenance and inspection times, or when they are flat broke. 9. Airplanes don't come with in-laws, but they sure come with plenty of regs! 10. Airplanes don't care about how many other airplanes you have flown before. A bad landing is a bad landing, no matter how much experience you have. 11. Airplanes and pilots both arrive at the same time, assuming the pilot does the job right. 12. Airplanes don't complain if you hose them down. They're just glad you cleaned up the mess you made of them. 13. Airplanes don't mind if you like to look at other airplanes. They know you don't have the type-rating to fly it anyway. 14. Airplanes can get high without throwing up. It's when the pilot can't keep it steady that problems arise. 15. Airplanes expect to be tied down. It's the only way to keep them around. 16. Airplanes don't comment on your piloting skills. They let the sounds, vibrations and your own fear do the talking. 17. Airplanes don't whine unless something is really wrong, like when you're throttles aren't in perfect sync, or a tie-down strap is loose, or your HF radio is on, or off, if you are flying on a Tuesday, if the moon is out, or if it's day, or... 18. However, when airplanes go quiet, just like a woman, it's a bad thing. Except when flying a glider. Quiet is when it's fun! <img src=icon_smile_clown.gif border=0 align=middle> |
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| Author: | 30mike-mike [ 10 Sep 2004, 05:27 ] |
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<img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle> "Live every day like it's the last, 'cause one day you're gonna be right!" Ray Charles (6/10/04 was the day) |
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| Author: | Hawg166 [ 10 Sep 2004, 06:42 ] |
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Touche ! By this time tomorrow I shall have gained either a pearage or Westminster Abbey........Nelson |
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| Author: | Horrido [ 10 Sep 2004, 10:28 ] |
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ROFLMAO! Hoping one of the three ladies on the board would respond appropriately as such. <img src=icon_smile_wink.gif border=0 align=middle> A suicidal determination to live... |
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