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Crazed surgeon amputates penis
From correspondents in Bucharest
July 19, 2004

A ROMANIAN surgeon underwent a fit of madness while operating on a patient's testicles and instead cut off the man's penis and sliced it into three pieces, hospital officials said.

The surgeon, Naum Ciomu, was described as a senior member of the hospital staff and a professor of anatomy.

He had been operating on a 34-year-old man for a testicular malformation when he committed the act, the officials said.

"We are shocked by what has happened. It is the first time we have had such a case," said Sorin Oprescu, head of the Bucharest emergency hospital where the patient was rushed for emergency reconstructive surgery.

The operations have been entrusted to a highly respected Romanian plastic surgeon, Ioan Lascar, who said he would try to restore the man's urinary function but that he was unlikely to recover normal sexual activity.

Doctor Ciomu has been banned from entering an operating theatre for two months pending the results of an investigation by the medical council, Oprescu said.

Meanwhile the wife of the unfortunate patient said she was suing Ciomu.

Agence France-Presse

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Who knows with a little lithium he could be back in two months any takers.

Obviously Ciomu is a recent gradute of the Elaine Bobbitt School of Surgical Procedures.<img src=icon_smile_big.gif border=0 align=middle> As part of the compensation settlement, the victim's wife will demand the surgeon "visit" her as often as she deems necessary.<img src=icon_smile_evil.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=icon_smile_wink.gif border=0 align=middle>

"Live every day like it's the last, 'cause one day you're gonna be right!" Ray Charles (6/10/04 was the day)

_________________
\"Those who hammer their guns into plows
will plow for those who do not.\"
- Thomas Jefferson

Perhaps he just had penis envy. He's going to have to get a Reebok style pump for the old lady at home. She'll probably sue for six million and settle for a strap on for him.

Smitty

A man is in a terrible car accident, and amazingly enough, comes out unscathed except for his penis. The doc says they can fit him with a mechanical one the will feel the same. The Small costs $2,500, the Medium costs $5,000, and the Large costs $10,000. The guy says he wants a medium or large, but want's to call the missus to make sure. He comes back with a crestfallen face, and the doc askes what happened. The man responds "She said she'd rather remodel the kitchen"

"Retreat, hell! We just got here!"-Captain Lloyd Williams, 2nd Marine Division, Belleau Wood, France, WWI