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I've been enjoying everyones posts in the "funniest hawg story" topic. It made me think a lot about the past. It made me think about all the scars I've recieved or those that were issued to friends of mine by the hog. Whether it be an AGM-65, a BDU-33, "THE HATCHET", or the fuel dump vent, I can recall many people recieving some nasty bites out on the line.

One of my best friends at the time got a nasty one while we were on TDY to DM from Spangdahlem. I remember during launches, looking to my left down the line and seeing him sitting on his ass, holding his head in his hands as blood poored out through his fingers. Seems he was checking the accumulators in the nose and decided to walk towards the tail, but instead of walking to the outside of the ladder, he walked inside it. Boy did he ever get tagged by the hatchet. (UHF antenna if I remember correctly) He got at least 25 stitches in the top of his head that day. Wasn't funny then, but looking back, makes me laugh. I'm sure you guys have better stories than that....

Dearm EOR late one night at DM walked into same antenna but only got five stitches

We were loading BDU-33's late one night at DM and our light-all had crapped out on us. Well, as with most stories, we were rushing and not paying attention.

I'd just finished popping one up on a TER on Station 4 and was headed back to the bombs to grab the next one. Suddenly I found myself setting on my butt<img src=newicons/tard.gif border=0 align=middle> and my crew daddy was shaking my shoulder, laughing his ass off and asking if I was OK.

I just hated it when the Pilots left the damn flaps down.<img src=newicons/anim_cussing.gif border=0 align=middle> I carried one hell of a rasberry on my fore head for the next week.<img src=icon_smile_blackeye.gif border=0 align=middle> To this day I don't recall actually hitting the damn thing.

"Slow is Fast - Fast is Slow"

_________________
Slow is Fast, Fast is Slow
Violence may not be the best option, but it IS an option

I bought the "HATCHET" during a launch in a rain storm, it knocked me to my knees<img src=newicons/tard.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=icon_smile_dead.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=icon_smile_blackeye.gif border=0 align=middle>shook it off, got the Jet off then noticed the Blood running down my arm<img src=newicons/anim_shock.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/anim_shock.gif border=0 align=middle>
Felt around and found the gash in my head, of course I put a dirty
Red Rag on it since thats all we had,went to the truck to get to the hangar and "Gibberish" (Carl you remember him) said "Ok" I sat down ansd we didnt move i said "Hey lets GO !" he said that "WIGGY" told him to stay until he was done LOX'ing<img src=icon_smile_question.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/madani.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/anim_shock.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/anim_cussing.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/anim_furious.gif border=0 align=middle>
I told him to "GO F- HIMSELF" and I 'll walk<img src=newicons/anim_furious.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/anim_cussing.gif border=0 align=middle>!

I got close to the ECP point and started getting <img src=newicons/tard.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=icon_smile_tongue.gif border=0 align=middle> so I broke RED to get to the Hangar and then "Gibberish" drove speeding towards me Yelling <img src=newicons/anim_shock.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/tard.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=icon_smile_shock.gif border=0 align=middle>ing -out and told me "You cant break RED!, I'm calling a "HELPING HAND"!
I told him about halfway out of it, 'GO RIGHT AHEAD,I'll PASS-OUT RIGHT HERE AND YOU CAN EXPLAIN IT TO TO OLDMAN!"

By that time RED-6 got me the Spec. Truck and took to me to the ER where "MSGT LILLY" (Flt Chief) got there and I walked in with him helping me and the Med-Tech asked "Whats your problem Sarge"?
I told him ."I hit my Head" he came over took the rag and said "I dont see anything wrong with your hand,where's the blood coming from?"
Lilly went "HIS HEAD!!!!!!!"
The Tech said "Ok have a seat and keep the rag on it"(COME ON) So we sat down and I leaned back against the wall trying not to "Black-out"
Then a SMSGT came out and got me to the EXAM room and that MED TECH who I saw when I first came in said "Hey Sarge! There's BLOOD on the Walls and Floor you put there" It needs to be cleaned-up!"
That SMSGT told him "GET A MOP THEN AND CLEAN IT UP YOURSELF,I'LL DEAL WITH YOU LATER"! <img src=newicons/anim_cussing.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/anim_furious.gif border=0 align=middle>
He was MAD<img src=newicons/madani.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/madani.gif border=0 align=middle>
The Dr came in and looked at it and said "You need stiches" (NO-JOKE)
The SMSGT had a TECH come in a cutiee and told her to "Deaden it" and get ready for Stiches.
That was the best part her doing that<img src=icon_smile_big.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=icon_smile_approve.gif border=0 align=middle> but the novcane wouldnt take effect no matter how many times they did it, so Finally I said
"Hey its dead"(it wasnt) But I got 15 stiches and a few days in the Barracks in my room.
But the Saftey Report wasnt pretty,I didnt LEAVE ANYTHING OUT!
Captian "P" She had a COW! and chewed some ASS-OUT!

That was biggest "Stiches" count I got, but I did get knocked-out at NTC by a pilot who PUSHED the ladder door button from the Cockpit because he was in a Hurry and I caught the Ladder in my FACE Hitting
MY MOUTH SQUARE-ON! in to my Front teeth<img src=icon_smile_dead.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=icon_smile_dead.gif border=0 align=middle>
Knocked me out COLD for about 3 mins, and when I got up the Major said "You shouldnt of been there" <img src=newicons/anim_furious.gif border=0 align=middle> Lilly and Poohbear had to Grab me before I took a "SWING" at him<img src=newicons/anim_furious.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/anim_furious.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/saevil.gif border=0 align=middle>
Went to the ER and they called a Oral Surgeon in and they couldnt figure out "How come you still have your front Teeth"? The X-Ray showed metal filing in my teeth and they had to scrap them out and to this day I still have some and the show-up on my dental X-Rays.

My lips were busted and I had a HUGE BRUISE on my left Cheek the whole TDY.
If Lilly and Poosier wouldnt of Grabbed me I probably would of been doing time.



Goose

They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.
Benjamin Franklin,
(1706 - 1790)

_________________
\"Live Free Or Die\"

I got bitten about a month ago while preflighting the TERs on 5 and 7. The space between those 2 is pretty tight and I caught my left ear on a sway brace. The funny thing is that you try to act all cool like nothing happened, but it hurt like heck. When I got back to the squadron to debrief 3 hours later there was blood on my ear and down my neck...

ATTACK!!!!!!!

Watched my roomate knock himself out on a live 500lb bomb down on the north ramp at D-M. Launching out the jet, he turned the wrong way and down he went. Out cold on his back, arms and legs spread out. Pilot was wondering what was going on because Bill wasnt talking to him anymore and he wanted to taxi. We drug him out from under the jet and it left the chocks. He had the mother of all headaches for a few days.

<img src="http://img117.imageshack.us/img117/457/bgnrjsiiw81q1gc.jpg" border=0>

Gravity....its not just a good idea, its the law.

Unfortunately I didn't see it but.....

We were at LOLA at DM flying Mk-84s. Right after I launched my jet I see ambulances and fire trucks screaming towards us. I'm trying to figure out what happened! Turns out one of the Load Toads was pulling chalks for a friend of mine and ran smack into the tail fins on the MK-84 he helped load!! So he's out cold under the jet, "Hammbone" is telling the pilot to hold breaks forever until someone sees the guy passed out under his jet. Pulled him out, pulled chalks, and the kid iced his head for quite a few days!

You might be a "Bulldog" if: You bend over and grab your ankles when you hear: "EXERCISE, EXERCISE, EXERCISE!"

_________________
3 Branches down... 2 to go!
Put on your tinfoil hats, the black choppers are coming, and I'm calling them in.
Former DCC OA-10A T/N 80-278

I'm surprised noone has gotten tagged by the LARS antennas. Those are like two fangs right behind the towell rack.
Had a freind walk into the tail of an AIM-9 once. Those nice little razor sharp stabilizer on the corners. Four or five nice little one half inch cuts all in a row on the corner of his forhead.

"By this time tomorrow I shall have gained either a peerage or Westminster Abbey !" Nelson the Immortal Memory

_________________
YGBSM !

Carl,

Who was the guy that took the "UHF" SQUARE IN THE FOREHEAD"?
He had a prefect "DENT" in his forehead for about a month, Black and blue as CAN BE. He was knocked -out COLD! they took him in the meat wagon to the Hospital.


I think the Funniest one I ever saw (not A-10),after everyone knew he was alright and later on was when I was at Scott AFB working T-39's.
They had spent $$$$$$$$$ bucks re-doing the Ramp because it would flood. Doing Pre-Flights after a Rain it SUCKED! water ever where.
So they designed the Ramp so it was HIGHER in the middle where the pad was. (DUMBASSES) so the pilots had to go "UP to the Pad " at a incline.Pulling Chocks was a PAIN IN THE ASS due to the Jet sitting pointing down.
Well being a Trainning Base you had the "Want Be Trashhaulers" flying.
"Slim Jim" one of the old crewdog's over 6ft and never said a word was bringing his jet in and the Student Pilot was creeping up the incline,The jet wasnt going so he gave it some more power,still it wasnt making it,so "Slim JIm" walked over to the Chocks figuring that they would just shut it down there.Which they had been doing and we towed it up to the pad.
The instructor pushed the "Throttles " FOWARD HARD"! the Student didnt have his feet ready to brake and LURCHED FORWARD and Catching Jim and all you saw was him BENT OVER THE LEADING EDGE GOING FOR A RIDE!!!!
They went about 25ft over shot the pad and the Student hit the brakes! The Jet stopped not "Jim" he went about 5ft more,knocked-out!
They took him to the Hospital where he stayed for a week, cracked his head, concusion,broke 3 ribs.

After that they re-worked the ramp to cut down on that incline, he was off work on C-leave for 30 days and 2 months light Duty.

We would start telling the Story and start Laughing and he would try not too,because it hurt still, but hey, We were a bunch of sick Bastards.

Goose

They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.
Benjamin Franklin,
(1706 - 1790)

_________________
\"Live Free Or Die\"

My crew was out dearming a bunch of birds on the ramp at DM one fine fall day. I was pulling the breech caps on the TERs and pulling the carts from the birds that came back with bombs. Often the breech caps would be siezed onto the guns, and to get them off, we'd pull the gun with the breech cap still on, whack it un the body of the ter a couple of times and that would loosen the cap enough to get it off.

I'd pulled the gun on the CL and went to whack it on the underside of the TER when I bashed the hell out of my left index finger. Right on the knuckle. It peeled back the skin a bit, but I didn't really think much of it. As I walked back to the truck, my knees just buckled and I dropped to the ramp and almost dropped the tray of carts. After a few I felt fine and slapped a bandaid on it.

Now, years later, I realized I'd chipped the bone and the index finger just aches on cold damp days. Being young and stupid creates aches and pains when you'er older.

"Slow is Fast - Fast is Slow"

_________________
Slow is Fast, Fast is Slow
Violence may not be the best option, but it IS an option

Dont remember getting any "good" hog bites.........but boy have I got several Phantom Bites from my early days! SOme of those hurt just to think of them again!

Several scars on the back from catching an aux air door...ouch!<img src=newicons/anim_cussing.gif border=0 align=middle>

Working Transient Alert in Aviano my 1st tour was fun, but also pretty tough having to remember when and where to duck depending what bird you were working at the time, with many days working upwards of 6 or more different style airframes!

Hey Goose
That would be JIM MILLER. During an ICT, loaded MK-82 slick on sta 2 Jim turned ans walked right into the fin. POW i look around and there is Jim just sleeping on the ramp.He two large knots one on the front one on the back. Art Casey's still on the jammer laughing his ass off Even after they hauled him off Jimbo still didnt know who he was or where he was at,
The meat wagon would NOT break red to pick him up so we drug Jim across the line for them.
You know this was about a month after that phase guy had been hit by the tug and landed on the tow bar handle

I still faithfully wear my flightdeck cranial so as not to smash my melon.

"By this time tomorrow I shall have gained either a peerage or Westminster Abbey !" Nelson the Immortal Memory

_________________
YGBSM !

Ice Pirate
Done the same thing but going in under flap.Light cart died and i caught the trailing edge across the bridge of my nose. Didnt break the flap but i did get a good nose bleed from it.
Cant count the scratches and cuts to the hands and arms from arming wires on 82s loaded on TERs, down at arm and dearm EOR

Billy,
I wore mine too it was called "My AGS hat" <img src=newicons/anim_bannana.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle>

Carl,

I just remember the "Dent in his Forehead" and Casey telling a story about it. I remember those guys.

We wont even talk about the Towing Accident <img src=icon_smile_dissapprove.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=icon_smile_sad.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=icon_smile_dead.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/smiley_salute.gif border=0 align=middle>

Goose

They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.
Benjamin Franklin,
(1706 - 1790)

_________________
\"Live Free Or Die\"

I might have been one of the first to be caught by the lars anrenna, i was at pope and the jet just came back from depot, never saw the new antenna, and whack! ouch!

JB

Unitam logica falsa tuam philosophiam totam suffodiant!!!!

Mine is pretty simple, 12 hours shifts, mind a million miles away... walked off the end of the wing!<img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=icon_smile_blackeye.gif border=0 align=middle>

Ugly But Well Hung

Explains alot, dice.<img src=icon_smile_wink.gif border=0 align=middle>

The Second Amendment: America's original homeland security.
Ya just can’t take life too seriously, because you aren’t going to get out of it alive anyway.

_________________
\"Those who hammer their guns into plows
will plow for those who do not.\"
- Thomas Jefferson

<BLOCKQUOTE id=quote><font size=1 face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" id=quote>quote:<hr height=1 noshade id=quote>
Explains alot, dice.<img src=icon_smile_wink.gif border=0 align=middle>

<hr height=1 noshade id=quote></BLOCKQUOTE id=quote></font id=quote><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" size=2 id=quote>

So I've been told. <img src=icon_smile_cool.gif border=0 align=middle>

Ugly But Well Hung

I don't think I got tagged working at Spang in the backshop. Two biggest things there were passing out in front of the First Shirt(locked my knees, I guess), and falling asleep leaning on a screwdriver on a LAU-129. That last one isn't hawg though.

F-117s are hungry suckers.

Ignorance may be bliss, but it sure ain't fun!

_________________
Evil is evil, no matter how small.

The most common one I had was climbing out of the cockpit and just as you stepped onto the ladder getting nailed by the top edge of the ladder door in the shin. The wind at DM always seemed to blow those doors closed at the worst time. My left shin still has a dent where I caught thoses doors.

Carl, you'er right about those cables. To this day I'd swear I still have wire splinters in my fingers.

"Slow is Fast - Fast is Slow"

_________________
Slow is Fast, Fast is Slow
Violence may not be the best option, but it IS an option

Sembach,AB I was a young airman three stripe. Broke my ankle falling off a frost covered jet while removing the engine covers. Not fun and twenty five years later I feel it. The GOMER I worked for told me to.

354AGS, MBAFB 77-79
Det 1. 81TFW 79-81
354AGS, MBAFB 81-86
Automatic Flight Control System Tecnician.
76-0519,77-0181,77-0196

_________________
76-0519/77-0181/77-0196
354TFW/354AMS/354AGS
Detachment 1 81TFW
Automatic Flight Control Technician
Big Green Loud Kawasaki Rider.

Yesterday, here at Nellis, one of our weapons troops got nailed coming out of the wheel well. Took about 8 stainless staples. He showed up for work today though. Didn't even mess up his part line!

Was at MB and my crew and I had just finished a Jett Ck. Climbed down from the ladder and for some reason walked under the jet inline with the UHF on the F-5? panel. Next thing I know I am on my butt and bleeding and my 3 man, actually a female, is standing over me with a BFW in her hand. I said "why the hell did you hit me?" She just laughed and told me what happened.

Better story is one of my former crew members from Shaw, now a MSgt, got a nasty hog bite while we were at Nellis. I took him to the clinic to get sewn up. Well this was his second trip to the Nellis ER for the same thing in two years. He said the Tech that sewed him up last time wasn't going to do it again as they did a sorry job. So there we are in the ER and some female SrA hears him telling this story about techs having less than stellar skills. In comes the Doc and Woody tells the Doc about his previous experience in that ER. Ole Doc takes a look at his previous wound and agrees, whomever sewed him up did a sorry job. So Doc says don't worry I will sew you up myself. About this time the SrA tech says, "Sir, I am qualified to do this procedure." Ole Doc looks right at her and quips, "What makes you think I'm not?" She shut her mouth and left the room. Woody got a quality job done on his nogging and we went back laughing our butts off.

Fender

"Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it."
George Bernard Shaw

<img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=newicons/anim_lol.gif border=0 align=middle>We never had Military Dr's on Days they were Civiy Doc's from downtown, and they just said "Looks Bad, or get this Etc..."
(Except for that SRA) The Tech's did the work, always had luck with good MT'S , and when you run into one with wings Them being FLT MED TECHS, makes it alot better, because I knew alot of them from Scott AFB.

Now I had my 2nd set of stiches (10) in my head(Hatchet Job) when I left for FT Rucker TDY, and they needed to come-out.
Msgt "Barney" wanted to take them out I said "NO-WAY" I didnt trust him with that Grin on his face.
I went to 'SICK-CALL"at the base Hospital and I got to tell you the Army treated me like a "VP". The Medic doing the Check-in asked the usual stuff but I said "I'm USAF, TDY here with the A-10'S"
now there was a line waiting, They took me RIGHT-IN!
I had 2 DR's one a O-6 and other one a Capt, 2 Nurse's both Majors and Medic's must of been 6 Folks in there!
Looking at all those "Stiches" and asked "How,When,Where Etc..."
while one of the Nures held my Hand (HOT DAMN!)the O-6 pulled the stiches with the Capt. and when they got thru the other Nurse cleaned-up my scar,combed my hair I was in "HEAVEN!" Barney couldnt believe what was going on.
Shook my hand and one asked about my "Vanguard Patch" I always had trading stock, gave each of them who wanted one a patch and told them "Come on out We'll give you a tour" Some of them did.

But that I have to say was some of my "Favorite care, and Great work",

Travis AFB , We wont go there.

Goose

They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.
Benjamin Franklin,
(1706 - 1790)

_________________
\"Live Free Or Die\"